בראשית, פרק ל״ד, פסוק ד׳

Following his initial actions, Shechem seeks to formalize his relationship with Dinah through marriage, turning to his father to make the arrangements. His approach to his father is not a simple request. It functions either as a direct instruction for his father to go and negotiate with Jacob, or as an absolute, uncompromising demand that must be carried out without question [רבנו בחיי].

This demand reveals a highly domineering attitude. Shechem operates under the assumption that the marriage depends entirely on his own desires. Viewing himself as the ruler of the land and seeing Dinah simply as a foreign girl, he speaks with the entitlement of an absolute monarch [רש"ר הירש].

Despite this arrogance, there is a practical reality behind involving his father. Even though Dinah is already in his house, Shechem realizes that he cannot truly win her over or establish a proper marriage without her willing participation. He needs his father to step in and secure the approval of her family, hoping their agreement will ultimately lead to her consent [ביאור יש"ר]. Furthermore, Dinah's specific status as a young girl dictates how the situation must be handled. She had explicitly informed Shechem that she was not an independent adult who could make her own choices. Because she remained strictly under her father's authority, any formal arrangement required Jacob's direct and explicit permission [מלבי"ם].